20230310 Raven Newsletter

March 17, 2023

Hail GFOP!

I type with fingers filled with March Madness levels of confused fear ahead of this weekend’s El Blazerico. I am used to Everton stumbling up to a Chelsea that is an Impregnable Death Star. An experience about which it is very clear what to think and feel. This Boehly’d 10th place burning pile o’cash Chelsea, I don’t know what to make of. Worse. They are on a sudden uptick in form, and a charmingly emboldened Graham Potter is dropping the F-Bomb. May our players channel the fight of Jesse Marsch watching a Princeton basketball giant-slaying.

This week has flown by with the speed of a Liverpool Champions League knockout campaign. We have been attempting to keep up with the spigotting soap opera that is Berhalter-Reyna, while taping a massive El Clasico podcast with the mighty Sid Lowe (more below), interviewing designers who can help us achieve a more consistent MiB football-tinged aesthetic, and planning out our World Cup 2023 talent. I managed to squeeze in a late lunch yesterday with my friend Daryl Morey, who always has fascinating data-informed questions he asks with fresh eyes about football. His latest: Why do Premier League teams fire their managers so often? I found myself explaining with a serious face about the “New Manager Bounce” as if it was a scientific theorem. Daryl laughed. Number crunchers amongst you, please do your thing. Especially those with Crystal Palace leanings. 

One big note: Yesterday, we launched Episode Two of VAMOS with Herc Gomez, Presented by Bud Light. And what an episode it is. The fallout from the Berhalter/Reyna investigation. The reason Alejandro Zendejas chose the USMNT over Mexico, despite it being the harder team to get into right now. And the greatest upset in CONCACAF Champions League history? LISTEN TO EPISODE TWO HERE. We are so proud to be working with Herc and bring this Podcast to the world. If you like it, please do us a favor and share, subscribe, rate and review. It will help this beauty grow and spread the gospel of CONCACAF to the world. 

2. To the Football

🏆 Champions League Quarter-Final draw 🏆 took place this morning and was incredibly lopsided in a way that will please Italian football fans. Tough outcome for Chelsea and Manchester City, who hot-balled their way into clashes against Real Madrid and Bayern Munich respectively. The City-Bayern rumble will be Pep’s first return to Bavaria. Napoli fans – and aren’t we neutrals all Napoli fans at this point? – will be elated with the draw, which pitches them against AC Milan. They will face the winners of Inter Milan vs Benfica in the semi-finals. Jamme bell', jà! (The first legs of the quarter-finals take place on April 11 - 12, with the return games on April 18 - 19.) 

ii. Chelsea vs. Everton Big Game Preview, Presented by Bud Light (Saturday, 1.30 PM ET, USA) 🍻😟

EL BLAZERICO. NOT IN THE FACE. What a difference Three Wins in a Row make for Graham Potter’s midtable Chelsea, for whom the move to three at the back has created a semblance of forward motion. Sean Dyche loves little more in life than to turn up at the party, piss in the punch, leave that party, have a fight with a stranger who looked at him funny in the street, yank a side mirror off a random parked car, chow down a quick donner kebab, and then round off the night with a 12-pack of Special Brew and a four-hour blast on Call of Duty. Three wins in his last seven games will mean the Ginger King will be thinking “puncher’s chance.” 

More: Everton. Despite the crap we unfurl in-game, watch this beautiful Jordan Pickford video and tell me that we do not always win off the field. This is honestly the essence of what the club I love is about. Empathy and community.

AND: Sunday, it is a Men in Blazers Television Show for the ages, as we welcome back to the program the only NFL future Hall of Famer other than Rog whose passion for the Premier League burns with the heat of one thousand suns. Yes, we talking JJ Watt. In this episode, we go deep on his beloved Chelsea and how he's experienced this turbulent season. He also gives his prediction for this summer's World Cup (spoiler: AMERICA) and discusses meeting Lionel Messi. If you want a taste of what's to come, check out a version of the Interview on our YouTube page (SUBSCRIBE, SUBSCRIBE, SUBSCRIBE). The full version airs this Sunday on Peacock, along with every episode of The Men in Blazers Show from the past two seasons. WATCH HERE. 

iii. Crystal Palace vs. Arsenal (Sunday, 10 AM ET, USA)

Palace stumble in managerless, having fired Patrick Vieira “with enormous regret” (on St. Patrick’s Day, to boot!) after a disastrous slide of one win in 14 Premier League games. They welcome the ex-Arsenal legend’s old side. The league leaders arrive having just been dumped out of Europe on penalties by Sporting Lisbon, who humiliated Aaron Ramsdale with their audacious half-field lob game. Will that loss turn out to be a blessing in disguise, clearing out the schedule for a squad who have one mission and one mission only, and lost Saliba and Tomiyasu in the process to injuries? Palace, who failed to muster so much as a shot on goal in three straight matches recently, are the only team to go winless in 2023. For Arsenal… 11 big games to go and counting… 

More: Roy Hodgson (!) is bookies favorite to replace Vieira. Benitez and Hasenhüttl are also candidates.

iv. Southampton vs. Tottenham (Saturday, 11 AM ET, USA)

Is this an official “off-week” on the Tottenham schedule? Conte’s erratic collective march down to bottom of the table yet increasingly cohesive Southampton. What could possibly go wrong? Southampton could be as high as 15th, borderline midtable, if they can just score a goal. 

v. Wolves vs. Leeds (Saturday, 11 AM ET, P’Cock) 🇺🇸

How will 19th place Leeds fare without having their Tyler Adams-Dawg in them? Wappingers Falls, New York’s finest has been dispatched to a specialist after injuring his hamstring in training. He will sit out the US Men’s games which follow. A major blow for club and country. Impotent Wolves will attempt to take advantage of his absence. Weston McKennie was benched last weekend. Could this be the moment he unfurls the full range of his talents on English soil? Gent is playing for a permanent move as transfer rumors begin to boil.

More: Complete Premier League broadcast schedule is here.

3. It’s FA Cup Quarter-Finals Weekend 🏆

Manchester City vs. Burnley (Saturday, 1.45 PM ET, ESPN+)

Major and Mini-powers collide as Vincent Kompany returns to City, a place where he won the FA Cup twice, bringing his 13-point runaway Championship leaders Burnley with him, like a Flemish Luke Skywalker facing up to Pep’s Catalan Vader. A game which asks the question: How does that Megalodon Shark Erling Haaland follow up his most jaw-dropping performance, in which he obliterated Leipzig, then exited the field and rued his missed chances, breaking down the imperfections in his game and where he believes he can still improve?  

In the other games, Casemiro-less Manchester United host Fulham (Sunday, 12.30 PM ET), Sheffield United and Blackburn Rovers (Sunday, 8 AM ET) battle to become the first non-Premier League team in eight long years to reach the semi-finals, and League Two Grimsby travel to Brighton and attempt to be the the lowest-ranked team to reach the last four of the FA Cup in history (Sunday, 10.15 AM ET). All games on ESPN+.

4. It is El Clasico Weekend!!! 🇪🇸🇪🇸🇪🇸

Real Madrid hope to keep their slim chances of a title chase alive against a scandal-mired Barcelona. The big news ahead of this one is… Barca will be wearing a Rosalia jersey. (Sunday at 4 p.m. ET on ESPN+).

b. We are delighted to release into the world our first La Liga show, an El Clásico Pod Special, Presented by ESPN+with one of the kings of Spanish Football Journalism, Sid Lowe. This was a really special conversation, one that goes deep not just on the Xs and Os of this weekend's seismic matchup, but the history of the game that makes the whole world stop. From the Spanish Civil War to the Messi vs. Ron Ron-era to modern day. Sid is such a wonderful storyteller and is able to truly give the listener a sense of what this rivalry means, both to those in Spain and around the globe. We are incredibly excited for you to hear this. Drops on our Pod feed Saturday. If you want to watch the game and don't have ESPN+, sign up here: espnplus.com/GFOP. 

c. Talking of this game of games, we have a special El Clasico collection to kick off our new collab with the GFOPs at Classic Football Shirts. Two of the most coveted kits in football, worn by legends of the game. 

5. US Soccer’s Daytime Soap Opera of a Week 🇺🇸😫

A firehose of a week on the US Men’s Soccer side:

a. The Reyna-Berhalter independent report came out and absolutely buried Danielle and Claudio Reyna. We broke down the immediate fall-out here (and while I mention that, please subscribe to our YouTube channel!!!).

b. Thierry Henry kept dropping hints he fancies the men’s job, causing many Twitter warriors to declare “he would be better than an MLS candidate” (his coaching record at Montreal Impact: W 8- D 2 - L 15 ☹️). 

c. Dual-National Folarin Balogun, who has netted a blistering 16 goals in 26 Ligue 1 appearances for Reims, was not called up for England and posted this cryptic message on his Insta Story which has gotten us all dreaming.

d. Gio Reyna was rightfully called up as part of the next US Men’s squad. 

e. Gregg Berhalter emerged from the shadows to begin his rehab charm offensive with an interview by addressing the English media in the Daily Telegraph. 

f. GGG is either angling for a job in Europe or he and Chrisian Pulisic are coordinating interviews to have him pick up the mantle again with the US, because yesterday the LeBron James of Football sat down with ESPN to say: "Everything that happened with Gregg first of all has been handled in an extremely childish manner. I think it's childish, it's youth soccer, people complaining about playing time ... Gregg's been extremely unfortunate to get into the position he's in now." Make of that what you will. 

On the coaching tip – why is all this happening? Mostly because of the vacuum – in terms of US Soccer’s insistence it will not fill the coaching role until the summer at the earliest as they attempt to appoint a Director of Football first – so rumors, emotions, and hot takes run amok. The Gio issue in particular has catalyzed a very active mailbag. Not a lot of calm, measured thinking there. When I scan the responses to our posts on this issue, one fan wrote “I will skip games when he is in the line-up.” Thank you to another commenter who broached the slightly delusional, “was Gio ever really that good anyway?” argument.    

Neither of these pathways can be the way. I received this message from a former player which I think captures the approach, not just to football but to life. “In the end, he is a kid. Grant everyone grace. You never know how it'll turn out. Ostracize everyone, then you lose the potential, life-changing mindset that failing can provide. The potential of grace allows for the chance for all of this to be a falling into place of sorts instead of making everyone fall apart.” I particularly love that line “the potential, life-changing mindset that failing can provide.” We all fail. If you are reading this, you know you have in your life. It is how you respond. What you learn. How you change and grow that matters.  

More: Last word on all of this. Worth watching the most incredible scene from Ted Lasso: “Be curious, not judgemental.”

6. This is the most important thing football fans should watch today

UEFA President Alexander Ceferin was asked about multi-club ownership – say, Qatar owning both PSG and Manchester United - and he Bond Villains an answer: “It is an interesting question. I think we should think about it for the future,”hinting that the UEFA regulations will be weakened. PSG’s President Nasser Al-Khelaifi became President of the European Club Association and a UEFA executive board member after siding with Ceferin to thwart the Super League. These talking points sound like they are cut from the dreams of power-brokering club owners. When I listen to these interviews, I can only hope that the fans will unionize, create their own representative body, and create leverage to gain a seat at the table, or else football’s dystopian future will be a Champions League final four pitching clubs owned by one or two owners against each other. More WWE than true competitive spectacle.

7. More Football, Did Ya Say?

a. World Cup 2026 will be ever so bloated. Twenty-four more games. 24 more half-time shows with Lalas.

b. Rory Smith on Kvaradona. My European Nights Podcast partner traveled to Napoli to meet the sensational Khvicha Kvaratskhelia and eat pizza. I love this piece so much.

c. Gianni Infantino was re-elected unopposed for a second term as FIFA president during the 73rd Congress in Kigali on Thursday, promising record revenues in the next four-year cycle of $11 billion as he called for more football to be played around the world. Mother Jones just published a story about how FIFA president Gianni Infantino’s rise in the soccer world has helped make him and some of the world's most corrupt and wealthy figures even wealthier. He’s the most powerful man in football. Everyone hates him.

d. Bolivian referees suspended after playing 42 minutes added time and the winning goal was scored in the 38th minute of added time. Mike Dean would never. 

8. Not Football and All the Better for It

i. French bulldogs are taking over America. Not ideal but I can think of worse interest groups to run the country. 

ii. Are boneless wings just chicken nuggets? New case could set dangerous legal precedent. Boneless wings are basically just unwrapped dumplings don't @ me.

iv. How ‘Spring Breakers’ Forecast the Next Decade of American Chaos. Once a week I wonder to myself whether Harmony Korine could have saved us if we had let him. There are very few truly wonderful things in this world but 22-year-old Harmony Korine on Letterman is in fact one of them. 

v. Why a cookie recipe made this NH Girl Scout go rogue. Would lay down my life for the Girl Scouts against palm oil movement.

vi. New Moon Suit for NASA’s Artemis Astronauts Unveiled. The thing about the moon is that much like your local bodega past 2 am, it really doesn't matter what you're wearing as long as you're still breathing and remember how to get home.

vii. Seeing double: Near-identical films that came out at the same time. I've always felt like there should be an industry term for this phenomenon but instead all we got was No Strings Attached.

viii. This dress survived for 3 centuries at the bottom of the sea. But I definitely still have older pieces of clothing from middle school in the closet of my childhood bedroom.

ix. Is Hugh Grant rude or just British? Weird false binary for an actor who has explicitly premised an entire career on being both British and rude.

x. Crime of the Centuries. Where does Everton's purchase of Cenk Tosun rank? 

xi. The college wrestlers who took on a grizzly bear. Monthly reminder that I sat through all two hours and thirty-six minutes of The Revenant in 2015 and have yet to receive any kind of reparations for that damage. 

xii. How to Lucid Dream. A cool thing about lucid dreaming is that you always know exactly how annoying the guy you're talking to at that party is going to be when he brings it up.

xiv. Why Is Everyone Rewatching Girls Right Now? [Desperately gazes inward: should I be rewatching Girls???]

xv. I love this Song: Milk for Flowers by H. Hawkline.

xvi. I read this book this week: Looking for the Hidden Folk: How Iceland's Elves Can Save the Earth by Nancy Marie Brown. A beautiful meditation on myth, science, belief, and the environment. Ultimately a love letter to Iceland, a place I miss so very much.

That is it for today. Big Love to Bud Light, who sent an incredible toy to my dog, Martin Scorsese. He genuinely loves it so much. I am on the precipice of adopting another dog. More news to come. Name suggestions welcome.

Let’s make great memories through football

Don’t take a second for granted

Big Love

Courage